1: “You drink last night?” 2: ” Nope, just allergy season.” PGP.

Taking a vacation day and spending 3/4 of it on your couch watching HGTV. PGP.

Headset hair. PGP.

Refusing to even go after an attractive coworker for fear of being the “office couple.” PGP.

Realizing you have 40 plus years before you can retire and have a life again. PGP.

My life is way more Peter Gibbons than Jordan Belfort. PGP.

Exclamation points in every email, because then it seems like you don’t hate everything about your job and the person you’re emailing. PGP.

Someone pissed on my favorite stall’s seat. Day ruined. PGP.

Getting excited over trying a new recipe, then realizing how terribly depressing that is. PGP.

Looking forward to Jeopardy every night. PGP.